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Every week, we invite you to explore a striking quote from a great psychoanalyst to reveal its depth and richness. These lapidary, often provocative formulas open up new perspectives on the intricacies of the human psyche. By deciphering these quotes with rigor and pedagogy, we invite you on a fascinating journey to the heart of psychoanalytic thought to better understand our desires, anxieties and relationships with others. Ready to dive into the deep waters of the unconscious?
“Depression is the price to pay for liberation from guilt” — Melanie Klein
Melanie Klein is the psychoanalyst who clinically and theoretically demonstrated that analytical therapy with a child is possible. Her observations of infant behavior during therapeutic sessions led her, among other things, to discover the necessity for the child to go through a depressive state to achieve psychic liberation.
Here is a very brief overview of her theory on infantile psychic development during the first year of life.
To understand it, one must imagine the infant possessing a living psyche, in full activity, continually interacting with its environment, driven by intense sensitivity that is the source of strong emotions and the appearance of phantasmatic representations linked to this interaction. The infant’s unconscious world is thus already constituted, with life and death drives present, and the Oedipus complex in construction.
Initially, due to its immaturity, the infant perceives the external world, closely linked to its mother, in the form of “partial objects” internalized, that is, parts of the breast, body, smells, looks, etc. When these objects provide psychosomatic well-being, the infant is satisfied and happy. On the other hand, if they prove unsatisfactory, causing discomfort and suffering, the infant will perceive them as aggressive, persecutory fantasies, to which it will respond with equally aggressive and destructive mechanisms. This is the origin of feelings of love and hate, which will alternate depending on its relationship with the mother.
In a second phase, the evolution of the infant’s development will lead to a notable change in perception: from partial, the object (the mother) becomes total. In other words, the parts of the mother perceived as scattered will come together into a whole maternal entity. This happens during what M. Klein calls the “depressive position.” It is this position that we will focus on in this article because it is directly related to the notion of guilt and reparation.
In this phase (which can reoccur at other times in life), the infant, still within the first year of life, realizes that the loved object (its mother) and the hated object are, in reality, one and the same person. This realization will be felt as a true emotional earthquake, as it implies that its aggressive and destructive fantasies are directed towards the very person it depends on and cherishes. From this realization will arise an intense feeling of guilt and the desire to repair the harm caused to this object. At this moment, depression enters the scene. But be careful: the depression Klein speaks of is a complex emotional state, made up of sadness, remorse and concern for the loved object. It is a maturation process, a necessary passage to reach a higher level of psychic integration.
The “price to pay” will consist, for the child as later for the adult, in accepting their ambivalent feelings of love and hate towards the loved object (parents and later anyone with whom close relationships are formed).
In this position, the child will develop their capacity for reparation, that is, the desire to remedy the fantasized damages caused to the loved one. This capacity will be crucial for establishing healthy and empathetic relationships. By going through this depressive phase, the child will gain a more nuanced and mature understanding of their relationships. They will move from overwhelming guilt to more rewarding solicitude. Winnicott put it nicely: “At some point in the history of the development of every normal human being, there is this passage from the stage of pre-compassion to that of compassion.”
What does this conception mean? It suggests that the ability to tolerate depression is actually a sign of emotional maturity. By facing our depressive states, we can become aware of our contradictions and ambivalences to achieve a more complete psychic integration.
Klein’s conception of depression as the “price to pay” for liberation from guilt is a major contribution to psychoanalysis. It provides a powerful framework for understanding how our early experiences of guilt and depression shape our adult personality and interpersonal relationships.
Indeed, in adulthood, a subject will likely have intimate relationships marked by distrust and emotional ambivalence in the form of love and hate. To avoid anxiety, they may then use unconscious mechanisms of retaliation, such as projecting their feelings onto others or denying the existence of these contradictions. The depression that may then occur will allow this subject, if they undertake analytical therapy, to revisit their unresolved internal conflicts, become aware of and face repressed feelings, recognize their own responsibility in their missteps, possibly accept their guilt, and repair the sufferings and damages caused to themselves and others, thus achieving a state of greater authenticity and emotional maturity.
This Kleinien understanding of depression invites us to change our view of depression: instead of seeing this painful state as a sign of weakness or failure, it proposes to rethink it as an opportunity for rebirth. Paying the price of depression means having the courage to refuse to remain ignorant of one’s subjective truth, to confront the inner demons present in everyone, to free oneself and achieve true emotional fulfillment.
Depression is often perceived as a weakness. But according to Melanie Klein, it is actually an opportunity for rebirth, a necessary passage to achieve greater emotional maturity by facing our inner demons.
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